Sayedikipedia

Tis an extraordinary day!
For it is today (and hopefully never again) that kingtiger and I are in agreement.
Ean has upped the standards for sexual innuendo! And perhaps he's overdone it.

... I should be slapped for that understatement.


Time to bump that topic with a new post! Dastardley Productions proudly presents!



The Sayedikipedia!

Wary wanderers and unsuspecting browsers, beware!
This page has terminology of sorts!
And to prevent confusion (and perhaps satisfy the stupid quota), we introduce this handy online encyclopedia of the lifestyles and definitions of Sayedism 102!

5 stooges (n., collective term)
Definition:
Royal mascots of the Imperium of Sayedism


Boneheads (n., plural)
Definition:
Heretics

Sayedian synoynyms:
Eggheads,
bananabrains.



Boobs (n., plural):
Definition (From: the uncyclopedia of Narcissism):
Things you love to grope.


Sayedian synonyms:

Milk Production facilities

Weapons of mass destruction

Cascading balloons from Hell

Shaken, not stirred

Mouse boobs (n., plural)
Definition:
Overpriced, yet unbelievably comfortable computer mouse (like the Logitech G9 with the jiggly mousepad boob padding).



Desexualize (verb)
Official definition:
Direct sexual urges into constructive behaviour.

Sayedian definition:
Take a meatcleaver and chop off business. Or use a machete. Both work well.
Please do not try this at home.



Fat ninjas (n., plural)
People who work in mysterious ways and bring food and destruction wherever they go.



Heaven (n.)
Definition:
JB HiFi
MetroPC
EB Games

Sayedian synonyms:
P0rn Store



Hiel heel (proclamatory)
Long live



Light of Sayedism (n., singular)
Definition:
(Blunt, rusty) Scissors used in ritualistic shlong removal/business extermination. (See 'nuts', synonyms).



Love (n., often followed by a feeling of Sayedian disgust)
Official definition: First base before sex.

Sayedian definition:
Nemesis to Sayedism.
A pain in the ass.

Quote: “If love is labour, then Sayedists work only part-time with minimum wage”.

Loyal followers of Sayedism (n., plural, derogatory)
Mother Chinas (See below, note 1),
Fat Chindians,
Sumo Japanese Wrestlers (See below, note 2),
Born by parts,
Indofrenches.

Note 1:
Mother Chinas
Definition:
Chinese medical students who are gifted with the processing power of Intel QuadCore Xtreme.

Synonyms:
Chinese Quad Core,
Pair of chopsticks.

Note 2:
Japanese afro-haired sumo wrestler (n., derogatory, slang):
Definition:
Japanese who possessed (at some time in the past or even presently) afros, and dream of 'Gardens'.

Moose (n., singular)
Definition:
A very large cow with big horns that goes 'moo'.



Nuts (n., singular)
Definition (from: the uncyclopedia of Ean):
Something that goes hard, and has a head.

Small: http://www.pillsreview.com/wp-content/themes/pillsreview/images/the-penis-1.jpg
Erect: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/db/Penis_Anatomy.gif

Official synonyms:
Balls

Sayedian synonyms:
Dangel Wangel Shingel Mingel

Dingly Wingly

Big Cahunas

Business

Badang Dong

Sack of Wonders

Keeper of the Eggs

Future Pickles

Old people’s Viagra-to-be

Shwingel Dingels

Pampers with wings (n., singular)

****CENSORED****

Even this is too damn near ridiculous to define due to Sayedism’s poor understanding of the menstrual cycle.

Pope-mobile (n., only one in existence at any given time)
Definition:
KingTiger tank. With a personal stereo/retro boombox.

Sex (n.)

Sayedian definition:
Highest crime in sayedism, punishable by shlong removal by chainsaw. An ‘icky wicky’ process, full of diseases and sticky white stuff.

Official definition:
What loser would want to look up sex on the internet?

Tanks (n., plural)
The transport of the future. For sayedists only. Peasants walk. A viable traffic solution!

The masses shall be saved (Expression, often misleading)
Definition:
Humans shall be desexualized (See 'desexualize' above).

Tooty fruities (n., plural)
Official definition:
Effeminate males

Sayedian definition:
Very sexual people



We be jammin' (expression, often annoying)
Definition:
Same as 'ya mon', except stolen from Jamaican Warcraft III trolls.



Wives (n., plural, biohazardous)
Definition:
PCs, source of all eternal happiness.

OR

(biological, human, female) Yapping money-consuming (Google ‘Gold Digger’) machines of horror.

Definition (from: the uncyclopedia of Ean):
Wonderful things with luscious lips, exquisite curves and cute laughs. Caution: May afflict Sayedists with random bouts of exotic erotic fantasies.



Ya mon (Expression, still annoying)
Definition:
A ridiculous exclamation from wanna-be reggae fools with reflective sunglasses and imaginary dreadlocks, used whenever possible for whatever reason, even when in disagreement.

More definitions to come soon! (Oh, Gawd NO!)
Sayedism commandments to follow! (Double 'oh, Gawd NO!')
Now that you've reached the end, you might be wondering what the front cover might look like in paperback.

Well, what better cover than something to illustrate why badang-dong removal is so important?

In YOUR FACE!!!