Today's teaching will supplement a ridiculously long 2 hour Yarra lecture after dinner. So take out your pens and make ready your kavorkian scarves, folks!
Sayedism 101, Tutorial 1
Learning Objectives:
- Cheese and the bigger picture
- Why medical insurance is essential for Sayedism!
- The ultimate sacrifice of our leader in the Great Milking, leaving the world a better place for all!
Watch the following video closely, as it accompanies today's lecture!!!
This level of dedication is expected from all students! (It also explains why there are so very few enrolled in the Sayedism 101 course)
During the event, a wary disciple of the Sayedian cause was quoted as saying, "See how even now our acolytes train themselves to the extremes in preparation of the Great Milking! Tis a great day indeed!".
The Messiah of Sayedism is gifted with the touch of Soft Cheddar. Similar to King Midas and his Golden Touch, the Messiah of Sayedism is instead gifted with his uncanny ability to turn anything to cheese and milk of varying flavors (including vodka).
The 'Great Milking' of course refers to the day when he shall address all his subjects in a colossal 2m x 4m stadium. His followers shall then chase him and tear him limb from limb, devouring his tasty delicacies.
Within 5 minutes all these serfs to Sayedism will suffer a short seizure stemming from food poisoning. This prophecy (with everyone dying) is analogous to The Apocalypse.
Despite calls for authorities to rein in the Sayedists, Australian PM Kevin Rudd said "We do not think they will cause anything that could be deemed a threat to national security". "Their ridiculous custom ensures that the majority of Sayedists shall remain hospitalized for the remainder of the year".
Comic CG Agency, MojoFLIX, illustrated the plight and outcome of all Sayedists in their comical video:
The Smart Rat
Until next time, this is P. Narcissist reporting.
References:
The greatest video resource of all TIME! Youtube
Kevin Rudd
MojoFLIX(A very special thank you!!!)
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