More Information on Sayedism course

Good evening citizens of the Great Soviet Union,

Following the crazy course information presented by our (FIRED gender confused EGGHEAD) admissions officer cheif Afro-Sushi, I thought it might be suitable to add more ACCURATE information about the Bachelor of Sayedism's course. I might also present some info on our breadth subjects.

Bachelor of Sayedism offers you a great oppertunity to discover the wonderful world of Sayed, its rules, your obligation and Sayedisms rewards for your action .

First, The handsome rules of Sayedism


1-NO SEX, hot mamas and gay daddies will make me seem less handsome and will cause disregard for Sayedism and its preachings.

2-EAT food(this is because of the joint venture between sayedism and Fatness first)

3-No Drinking BEER, Beer will distract you from my handsome preaching

4- No more than two balls on a chair(I dunno what the hell is this but thats what the picture says) Or it could be no extra implants for shingel wingel.

5-No smoking, makes you stinky and Sayedism will not tolerate stinky clients.

6-Physics is GAY! and I dont mean happy >.> Sayedism will not have gay subjects, people perhaps but not subjects.

7- Yell Mother land everytime you see me or Comrade(My arabian homie).

Your duties towards Sayedism and their rewards

1-You must hold against the influence of Society and their attempts to make you go "Hellooooo there Hot mama or Hot gay daddy"(sayedism respects the gay minorities).

you MUST fight till the end. Even if you have to go Kablooey in effort to protect your handsome master from the vile forces of Milk factories, twin lesbians and naked women advertisements.

If you die, then you get 72 PCs :D ahh thats what I call heaven.

If you are injured, Sayedism will reward you with healing and plenty of moustaches.


and now Moving on to the breadth subjects of sayedism

These were carefully designed to stimulate your stupidit...I mean intelligence.

(A)


it will have practical lessons of eating four Mie gorengs in 5 minutes, All must be fat so we can sit on our enemies.
warning: you may be forced to listen to the song Yellow submarine >.<

(B) and then use them to annoy off everyone.


(C)
This is a very important breadth, it will have a 10 thousand word essay in which you have to praise Sayedism and Argue that Barney and teletubbies are part of an evil plan conducted by Dr.Zoidberg to stop kids from eating fish.

(D) How to command your tank and troops in battle.

Examples of practical lessons:

Join the wonderful multicultaral unsexual campus of Sayedism, come to the dark side...we have cookies and junk food x[
Over and out.

Introducing.... the Sayed Model

Recognising the need for well educated and informed Sayedists, Kommander-in-Chief Tong Zhi Sayed has tasked me to come up with a university course fitting for his great knowledge.

After working with the geniuses behind the /sarcasm *WILDLY* popular /sarcasm Melbourne Model, we introduce...

THE SAYED MODEL

The Sayed Model is the premier Higher Education gate way into the upper echelons of Sayedism, and possibly into Sayed's pants. It offers a well-rounded education giving students a full view into the philosophy (or lack-of) of Sayedism, the applications of Sayedism in the modern work place as well as providing students with higher education options.

The Bachelor of Sayedism is designed to be a 3 year course, and is structured as followed (without any of that breadth bullshit). Just kidding, breadth is awesome!









The Sayedism Honours year builds on the Bachelor of Sayedism and introduces higher research options.



The Masters of Sayedism offers Post-Graduates and new dimension to Sayedism research, and is offered to high achieving Honours Year students.



The Doctor of Sayedosophy is the ultimate of ultimates in Sayedist Peon education, and is offered only to the brightest (actually, dumbest) of Sayedist pupils.



These courses will be offered at the newly formed but somehow ancient and unrespected University of Sayed, College Square, Level 6, Unnumbered Conference Room.

Applicaton fees are 5 fish fingers, and applications for Spring 2009 close December 2008.

If needed, please contact:

Admissions Officer cum Chief of Butt Secks
Ph: 1900-ADMISSIONS-UOS
email: admissions@unisayed.com

The Bachelor of Sayedism, and all its related courses, The Bachelor of Sayedism (Honours), The Masters of Sayedism, The Doctor of Sayedosophy are copyrighted trade marks of the University of Sayed.

Sayedism and marriage

Good evening comrades of the great Sayedistic Union!

Today I will go through a very important aspect of the philosophy that is Sayedism. That is "Holding your shingel wingel". True sayedist will chop chop their inner instincts os sexuality!! No women, gay men, lesbians and shemales or transsexuals are allowed. You will instead dedicate your time to think of Black suits and Tiger tanks.

Reasons behind this ideoligy?

1) Psychological reasons:
In this I will be talking from an arabian prospective. Women in arabian culture NAG, and by nag I mean talking in a horrible voice with a rate of 100 words per second. It will make listening to your boring lecturers seem like a picnic. This will be even more painful in the case of marrying a gay man, since they will be talking about fashion, nail polish and how their ass looks in tight jeans UNTIL you head goes kablooey. Despite that, the way they walk and talk might provide some amusement to crazy people such as myself.



2)Financial reasons
You cant argue this one back :p unless you have done HOI in Trinity college. Women LOOOOVE buying STUFF!! Or atleast thats what arabain media show. They will make you go bankrupt and leave you homeless. generally speaking, they will try to be up to date with fashion, makeup, Oprah diets, facelift, Botox and every "stay young and sexy" crap there is. And if you are terribly unlucky, they will want the latest phones and super model clothing. You will CRY!! Unless, she is a gamer which will make the money well spent. STILL, you will suffer.

The diagram here illustrates the normal pathway of a man compared to the route taken by a women in a mall. The outcome is ...unimaginable.



3) chemical reasons:
Ahh, this one is the king of the hill out of all my points. Those types of relationships(i.e. gay or normal marriage) will general involve some unhygeinic things...you know.... the unmentionable things moving and the substance of doom spilling! OHH GOD...I ma getting nigthmares tonight. Its like "Baddaah bing baddah boom"-->broken beds and washing sheets every freakin day. Since I am a man of science I will bring evidence. Studies have shown that you might get a heart attack during having business( and I dont mean financial TRANSACTION >.>) !!! 0_0 I am not making that up! I swear I read it in a newspaper!
Warning: This is more hazardous with gays since they might have had spicy food.

4) Economic reasons:
Ok !! this one is important so listen up!!! STOP HUMPING EACH OTHER!!!! we have enough humans!! My mie goreng price has gone up to 70 cents due to higher number of humans born! Damn you!!! Six freakin billion eggheads!! COME ON!! Enough fluid exchange already! We need to go down to 2 billion again! brrrrr Please just dont do JOJO with each otehr for 40 years! thats al I am asking!! Cant you throw water balloons at each other instead.....soon enough earth will look like this --->


and finally
5) Because I SAID SO >:[



SO shut it and listen to me, I is **bleep** smart and philosophical. Every true brave sayedist must chop off business and sell as pickles. Revenue guaranteed xp Remember my words and do not stray and surrender to the temptation of caves of wonders, milk facilities, tenticaled octopus looking organ(A.K.A badong dong dong) or the famed holes of doom. Chop it off or use fast dry cement.

P.S. I deny all alligations os sexism since I targeted gay men and women too :D and in the words of Jeffrey "I dont give a sex about it" or was it "ahh business it"?...I dont give a business about it? 0_o? I just changed the f words he uses with the actual words. They dont sound normal though. I hate the F-word!! creates bad images of whoever says it and nearest creature or object in my head !!!!

"Fools, The warning has been given, their fate is in their own hands now" (Madiev, the last guardian of earth, warcraft III)

Over and out.

Quickie in the Toilet [for Sayed]

heres a quick blog post.
Now I was planning to make a nice news report one like last time.
but clearly Im short on time.





So anyway, heres some all filler no killer.














THE SAYED TIMES





Reports have held account that after the devastating attack by the AARF on Premier Sayed during Operation Prosh Week, the grand leader has decided to battle the scourge of "bouncy businesses" once and for all.





Our Great Leader has declared that from this day forth, citizens shall be rewarded by combating flimsy external body organs by being rewarded a place in the Prestigious Imperial Sayedism Army Academy (PISAA).





PISAA, first established in the 1808SY has been renouned throughout the world for its aggressive use of tanks, and the exploitation of the Stormtrooper Effect in its many armed branches.





General Moustache, a -5i Star general was confirmed the rumours of the new incentive to the people.





" However, us the army being smarter then the great leader have realised that this plan is flawed. Obviously people would rather not loose any of their organs. However, our engineers with all their knowledge of fluid mechanics have came up with a practical and eye appealing solution. Not only will this new protocol bring out a revolutionisation of our armed forces, it too shall rid our nation of dangling organs. Not to mention it too has Kevlar properties"








Reports have indicated that the first batch of testing amongst the people shall begin with the females first. If found successful, males will be made to undergo similiar procedure.





Our people hail the Leaders ideas as great and fantastico. Truly, it makes our army





" Harder Better Faster Stronger"





Here is the lastest recruiting poster.

VOTE! OR DIE!

I got bored of waiting for sayed's post so I went ahead and made one now. Kudos to ZeigHeil for his timely update! (And preventing another Double Post catastrophe. The horror...)

The Great Presidential Favicon Election!

And here are our candidates!
PS: Yes, the favicons are SUPPOSED TO BE THAT SMALL!

EarthWorm Jim

Here comes the inevitable tank theme. Of course, our leader has a fetish for Dawn-of-War style/futuristic tanks, so I shall put one up now lest he punishes me with his dreaded bicycle kick of fury:

SuperMario (I know we're defaming the poor wittle guy, but who cares?)

And last but not least, the Combine (queue dark and moody intro music)

And now for some EYECANDY!

Ah, yes, the world of tomorrow, where everyone owns their very own dawn of war-style tank. You're really drooling now, aren't ya, KingTiger?

This speaks volumes about where we're headed. And interestingly it's right on topic. I see so much of sayedism in just one pic. ;)

And of course, for some much needed comic sexual release:

Forgive me, 'O spiteful motherland, but I grow weary of each passing innuendo left in the wake of ZeigHiel and his boundless sexuality.

...We have much to learn from his ways.

Leave comments to vote!

Until next time, this is P. Narc, hitching a ride on the expressway that is life.
Traffic is awful.
Ah, well... PacMan, AWAY!